2015 Windy 500 dates announced!

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​I flew to Switzerland last night to attend the official press announcement for the
2015 Windy 500.
​The event was a phenomenal, star-studded extravaganza.  I sat between Ben Stiller and Mark Cavendish.  Can’t believe that our little ride has grown into a Worldwide affair.
Anyway, the 2015 Windy 500 (V) will once again travel North to Escanaba, MI.
Looks like we may have found the perfect route in 2014, so we’re sticking with it.
The ride will take place July 31 – August 3, 2015.
Mark your calendars!
Interested in riding?

9 Reasons Not To Miss The 2013 Windy 500

164 days until the 2013 edition of the Windy 500 rolls…

This year, we’ve added a new twist: those in the know will know.

Why should you ride your bike 500 miles in 4 days?  Here are 9 reasons:


This is what you’ll see. Every day. For miles and miles and miles…

1 man's meal

All that riding will make you hungry and thirsty. So you’ll eat. And you’ll drink. As much as you can.

Flat 2

You’ll experience quality time with your friends while you learn the fine art of bicycle maintenance.


You’ll sip from the finest wells in America. We called this one “Fart Water”.

Sign language

You’ll learn new languages and/or how to make PBR soup with your thighs.


Not enough Tequila in this town to make that woman pretty. But enough to make Jeremy wander around aimlessly for a few hours…


Deluxe Super 8 accommodations

Flat 1

Friends, bike maintenance, blue skies, blah, blah, blah…


In the end, it’s really about the people and the ride.

2013 Windy 500 route

Who comes up with this crap??

Who comes up with this crap??

The 2013 Recipe for the Windy 500 is almost fully baked:

It’s a bit of Urban mixed with a bit of Suburban, with a pinch of Crazy.

We’ve done North.

We’ve done West.

We can’t go East.

This year, we’re headed South.

Milwaukee to Chicago to Michigan to Chicago to Milwaukee.

4 days

500 miles.

We have about 8-10 riders so far, and 1 or 2 support drivers.

Some will bow out once they cower before their significant other, or actually look at the map.

Others will join up – it could be YOU!

Pace will ratchet down a bit this year for rose smelling and additional beer consumption.

If you have a bucket list, but don’t know Jack or Morgan, this could be your chance to make it happen! 

2012 Windy 500 is in the books!

Where do I start??

Here is the complete list of rules for the event:

  1. You must ride a bike 500+ miles in 4 days
  2. You must ride in at least 2 states
  3. See Rule #5.  HTFU.

Here are some basic facts about the ride:

  1. You will wonder why you signed up for this stupid thing by the end of Day 1.
  2. You will eat Mexican food.  A lot.
  3. You may break a spoke.  Or 2.
  4. Your beer to all other liquids consumed ratio will be roughly 1:1.
  5. You will most likely flat. Maybe more than once.
  6. It will be as hot as Hades on at least 1 day.
  7. You’ll tell your friends about the adventure for years to come.
  8. You may be asked to drink tequila out of a handgun.
  9. Someone will get stung by something.  It might be you.
  10. You will tell or listen to more stupid “butt” jokes than you have in your whole life.
  11. It will rain so hard you will consider building an Ark on at least 1 day.
  12. You will be yelled at by Mark Lampe.
  13. On Day 5, you will actually miss riding your bike, but have no desire to sit on it.  At all.
  14. You may start craving bad gas station food when the ride is over.
  15. You will see some of the best scenery Wisconsin has to offer.
  16. You will start planning for next year’s ride at the end of Day 4.

How about a few memorable quotes:

  • “This water tastes like a fart”
  • “Ask your Mom what a pervert is…”
  • “Don’t lean your bike on my truck…”
  • “Hey! Whoa! Wrong bed!!”

Maybe pictures are the best way to tell the story:

Left to right:
Jeremy Christopherson, Jeremy Thorpe, Jeremy Kayzar, Jeremy Balden, Jeremy McArdle, Jeremy Grosz and Jeremy Lampe.
Photo by Jeremy Sukkert

McArdle enjoying a daily flat tire sandwich while  simultaneously ruining the ride.

“Technically” not a flat…

“Definitely” a flat.

Balden’s ass… Day 1

Balden’s ass… Day 4

One of our favorite activities was taking time to pull over to stop and smell the flowers each day.

How every day ended…

How every day started…

Rule #2 fulfilled

Notice anything unusual in this picture?? Yep, Balden is SITTING on his bike in the background!

We did about 17,000 feet of climbing. Here’s a little bump that was about 3 miles long:

We only asked the prettiest, cleanest Meth hookers with the best teeth and fewest open sores on their face to take our picture!

Best surface for walking a mile in Shimano cleats? A mile of wet rocks!

We did actually manage to ride our bikes for 506 miles over the weekend.

Come ON McArdle!! Just WALK from here!!

2013 Windy 500 planning starts today!  It will be bigger and badder than ever.  


WINDY 500 planning meeting (with beer) on February 2nd!

Note: February 2nd is the correct date for the planning meeting. I originally posted the wrong date (Feb 7).

The 2nd Annual WINDY 500 dates are set!

The 2nd annual 500 mile, 4 day bike ride (not to be confused with the Trans-Europe “piece-of-crap-only” car rally taking in 22 foreign countries over 23 days) will be held on August 3-6.

Breakfast of Cham-peens!

Details are still sketchy, but we have at least 100% more riders, AND a support vehicle!!  Having a sag wagon will make this a legit contender.  I would not be surprised if both the Schleck brothers and Cadel sign on for 2013.  

Lunch of Cham-peens!

Now the planning begins.  Where are we going??  Last year, we set some informal route guidelines in stone:

  • Round-trip route must be a minimum of 500 miles over 4 days.
  • Route must cross at least 1 state line.

Do we go back to the UP?  If so, do we make the same stops, or head to a different destination?  Do we go West (Waterloo, IA?  Rochester,  MN?)  South (Saugatuck, MI?  Danville, IL?)   Straight through the Earth’s core (Beijing, China?)  Which route do we take?  Who’s in charge of the map this year (NOT me)?  

Dinner of Cham-peens!

You don’t even have to be a participant to take place in the planning.  We welcome all input!  Just show up at:

Cafe Hollander

7677 W State St, Milwaukee, WI 53213

February 2nd @ 7:00pm

2012 Windy 500 dates are set!

Next year’s 2nd Windy 500 will take place from August 3rd to August 6th.

500 miles in 4 days.  Nothing but bikes and beers.   This year’s adventure left us all with some great stories as well as something to brag to our grand-kids about someday.

The goal this year will be to (at least) double the number of riders.  We’ll have a support vehicle and even more fun (did I mention beer yet?)

Bookmark the website, and check back for details:


ToAD and WORS schedules are posted, this does not interfere with either, so get it on your calendar.

I’d like to get a preliminary count of people who are interested, and we can all do the planning together in Spring.


Let my friend Chevy explain why you should “…go for it!”:

1st Annual(?) Windy 500 ride: July 15-18

Are you in?

“The first question which you will ask and which I must try to answer is this, ‘What is the use of climbing Mount Everest ?’ and my answer must at once be, ‘It is no use’.

–         George Leigh Mallory, 1922

The Windy 500: 125 miles a day for 4 days. 

Mowaukee to ‘da UP and back. 

Why?  Why not.

No registration.  No fees.  No support.  No worries!

As of May 25th, there are 4 participants.  If you’d like to tag along, all you have to do is say yes.  We’ll be making (cheap) hotel reservations soon, so unless you plan to sleep in a tent (which by the way is an acceptable option), let me know ASAP.


CASUAL PACE!!  This will not be a hammer-fest, we’ll match the pace of the slowest rider.

Stopping to sample any local culture (aka: beer) that looks good. 

This might be the last fun thing you ever do…