Now what?

I cranked up my training this year, made it through ToAD and the Windy 500, and then… nothing.

I have another Century to ride tomorrow, will probably do it on my track bike for fun, but I have no desire to finish out the WORS series or even do my first CX race.  The funny thing is, I don’t care.  And, I don’t care that I don’t care.   4,000 miles of riding/training and I’m ready to just ride my bike because I enjoy it.  What a revelation.

I think it really sank in on the 4th day of the Windy 500, our 4th day in a row of 120+ miles.  Thanks to my friend Mark calling me out, I finally realized that was still training.  This is a ride that I dreamed up, specifically to get out and ride for fun with friends, and after 3 days I was still dropping people.  Friends.  Who were just riding for the sake of riding.  Although they weren’t saying it out loud, I know they were thinking: “…what a dick!“.  Of course, I was oblivious to the whole thing – too concerned about the next Strava KOM, or how many more miles we could go without a rest stop.

It seems that September is always the time of year that I get tired of “training”.  Maybe it’s because I’m not training toward anything, I’m training away from stuff.  My biggest goal of 2012 was to be a “super-domestique” at ToAD.  Mission accomplished.  I moved up to singlespeed Comp at WORS, but I was so focused on ToAD that all I want to do this year is ride road bikes.  At first I was bummed, but then I realized… who cares?  Bikes are bikes.  Riding is riding.

In years past, I don’t think I ever “got it”.  I don’t think I ever made the connection.  There’s riding and there’s training, and you CAN have it both ways.  As I mentioned to another friend of mine, I was a late bloomer.  I’ve always ridden bikes, but I was never competitive until a couple of years ago.  So maybe I don’t have that history of being fast or racing to fall back on, I’m still building my resume.  Maybe that’s why I feel like I can’t let off the gas sometimes.  And maybe that’s why some people might think “…what a dick!”.

All I can say is: I’m sorry.  I get it now.  I get the “Crappy Bike Ride” and I get how Ronsta can crush it at WORS and then go out and do social rides in Waukesha with the same level of enjoyment.  I get how Russell can race track and commute to work on a 3 speed with a giant basket on the front and not see the difference.

I’m not the fastest guy out there, but I try really hard.  Maybe it’s time to be the slowest guy out there for a change.