Golf is where it’s at! Look at John Daly – livin’ the dream. Sleep? Proper diet? Exercise? SUCKERS. Just because I have barely ridden my bike lately and only slept occasionally is no reason for me to give up on my dreams of being a competitive athlete. Seriously, look at that tank!
Had I known I could suck a Newport Menthol in competition, I’d have made the transition eons ago.
Gimme a cheeseburger already!
...Faster than Last 
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